Is it just me or does it seem like everywhere we look there are posts designed to make us feel bad?
“The 10 parenting habits that are harming your children.” “How to Complete Every Pinterest Project while Keeping the House Spotless and Making a Fantastic Dinner while Being a Present Parent.” “Are You Setting the Best Example?” ARGH! Enough already! Here’s one for you: “Don’t Beat Yourself Up!” I have felt the pressure and the anxiety—throw the perfect party, have the kids enrolled in sports, show you care by being on the PTO. How DARE you drop your child off to school in PAJAMAS?!?! A few sayings have helped me combat the Momma Guilts:
You only have an obligation to keep yourself and your children happy, most of the time
Your kid is not going to be happy all the time, and usually when they’re not it’s because they have a good mom. Keep in mind—the rough times foster the greatest parenting opportunities. It is hard to see your child upset, but let go of the guilt and remember to trust your motherly instincts. You know what’s best. And a note on happiness: it’s really hard for your kids to be happy if you’re not. Take time to work on yourself. Don’t forget about yourself. After all, you are your kids’ most important person. Stop worrying about keeping up with the neighbors and the PTO President; her parenting style isn’t better than yours. You both do what’s best for your family.
Be happy with what you accomplished, and don’t feel guilty for the things that have to wait
I have to remind 6 constantly that there are only so many hours in the day and that sometimes things have to be rescheduled. Instead of worrying about disappointing her, I use it as an opportunity to show her that things pop up in the “real world” and you just gotta roll with the punches. Be proud of yourself and your children for that day’s accomplishments and show them that we don’t need to stress over the desire for perfection.
They won’t remember the expensive toys. They’ll remember the time shared
Think back to your childhood. What were your favorite memories? Do you remember the most expensive gift you ever receieved? Was it all it was cracked up to be? Or do you think about tickles and laughter and smiles and playing? Kids don’t need everything you can afford to give them. Often living with less encourages character. Don’t feel bad about what you can’t afford. Spend that energy playing with your kids or going on a walk. Create a free family tradition like Movie or Game Night. And nights when you’re exhausted and can’t read that fourth book? Well, that’s okay too.
What are your mantras that help keep the Momma Guilt at bay? Let me know below! <3, M